I’ve wanted to write about the fact that a “lack of boundaries creates a lack of respect” for some time now but it feels somewhat confrontational… and so subsequently makes me feel afraid. But it has to be said so here goes.
Did you know that there is such a thing as “digital personal space”? And the two go hand-in-hand : “Digital Personal Space” and “Boundaries”.
As I am approaching the 3 years in business mark (!), the one thing that stands out most in the 3 years is getting people to respect what boundaries and personal space looks and feels like.
Most people understand boundaries within the realm of everyday life. Knowing when you have overstepped the mark but also understanding and giving people personal space. Simple things like not standing on top of someone in a queue or not sitting too close to people. These are things that we just learn as we grow up. But with the rise of digital and with everything being readily available to us at the touch of a button there’s most definitely a whole new space that needs to be considered – that of your “Digital Personal Space”.
Imagine this – you are enjoying some downtime at the weekend with your family and living life to the full. You know that kind of happiness, the fussy feeling. Then a message pops up on Facebook messenger, Whatsapp, Instagram, Linkedin looking something done or asking a question.
How does it make you feel? Annoyed? Disgruntled? Concerned? Of course it does. Someone has invaded your digital personal space in your own time and they are most probably not even aware that they have done that.
“You reap what you sow”…
1. Everything that you do has repercussions. It comes back to you one way or another.
2. You cannot escape the consequences of your actions. What you do comes back to you.
3. You will see the long-term effects of your actions.
And just like that – the minute you respond to that message you reap what you sow. Guilty.
At all hours of the day, night, and on weekends (without fail) someone will inevitably message me on those channels about something to do with business. A quick – “can I ask your opinion on this” question … and just like that my weekend of “downtime” has been invaded through my digital personal space.
If we don’t stop this now, our personal space will no longer be that…
Who teaches us these boundaries? What are the rules?
I guess it is up to us – as business owners – to take responsibility and respect what boundaries look + feel like, and very politely calling people out when they cross them.
It’s taken me nearly 3 years to get to this point.
A lot of women (maybe men too?) feel afraid of putting boundaries in place, because they’re worried it’ll make them enemies. If that’s the case then they were never your type of people to begin with. ⠀⠀⠀⠀
Are you a business owner struggling with boundary setting? I would love to hear from others on this topic so please share your thoughts.
Thanks, Niamh x